This is one of those blogs where I lose a few friends!
How many of my Transvestite friends say that they would love to find a GG (Genuine Girl) that they could go out with who would take some time to understand them because as a T-girl they can offer so much more than the boring old grey man. However in so many cases this just does not happen. Bringing a third personality into a relationship does not work for all and causes interminable discussions between the parties as to limits and expectations.

Party TV1

Be Inclusive

It’s an eternal question we all ask and I have discussed at length in other posts. However it was very interesting for me to experience the ‘Group’ mentality of Trannies a few weeks ago on a Tranny holiday.
On this trip everybody else was dressed but me. For reasons I won’t go into just to say I really was not in the mood to dress at that point in time. As a result I was able to be the observer rather than the participant. It allowed me to view the group from a subtle distance and with some objectivity… girls this may cause a little hurt but it’s for the benefit of all! Am I now a Tranologist?
Of course the first thing that struck me which is normal for anyone meeting a Tranny for the first time was the eternal me, me, me of the T-girl. But that’s normal and I knew that already. We all see it when we go out. One’s focus is almost always on oneself as this is a fleeting moment of escape from your normal ‘vanilla’ existence into the inner femme. Your rare chance for the world to see the other part of you and your need for admiration of what you are really like. And by God you are going to make the most of it in the short time you have!
But that is obvious to everyone. There is nothing new here. Cameras out selfies taken, gotta post immediately on social media , constant mirror checking, excessive behaviour beyond the norm etc etc etc. We all understand this, perhaps not to the newbies who are desperate to tell the world what they feel and find out more about themselves through the medium of a group of understanding friends.
However one of the biggest things I encountered was that even a small group can be quite exclusive, but not elitist. And I mean that in the sense of the us and them not the, wow how good are we, connotation. Despite them all recognising me as being a tranny and accepting that I was in male mode it was clear that I was not one of them. Also I did not feel one of them in my own mindset either. This was genuinely not intentional on my part but it allowed me to observe them from a completely different perspective when I was not in the realm of being a TV. I felt distant either because I was not getting the buzz they got  or because I couldn’t contribute. But it was noticeable that outsiders could view this as being a very exclusive set with a closed agenda and membership. Its not intentional but there is a commonality that binds the group that excludes others.
Party TV 2

Partying Is For All Not A Few

It’s just like a bunch of rugby boys getting together in a bar and talking line breaks and scrummaging. If you have little knowledge of what goes on then you can only contribute in small amounts but when the conversation gets into full swing you feel sidelined. The same applies to ‘girls nights’. They are not deliberately pushing you out just excluding you by default. Even their best efforts to include you really amount to little as they are so focused on enjoying their own femme time. They will return to your boy mode tomorrow. You alternatively are just not in the game.

Now a few groups who are exclusive in this nature are downright rude and ‘the not one of us’ syndrome cuts in. I have particularly experienced this when Trannies and TS’s come into close contact especially when the TS went out first with a TV group.
I have always hated the fact that in our group we have nurtured the TS feelings of some only to be blanked by them as soon as they decide to go the whole TS route. Rejecting friends on the basis that they are not ‘real’! The Transvestite on the other hand tends not to be so aggressive. By their nature they are letting out a softer person, but when dressed they still see it as their time and their discussion. They don’t tell others not to join the group (as many TS’s I have encountered have done to me) but they can do it in subtle ways that naturally exclude others without knowing they are doing it.
Two types in particular are the Trannybore who gives this constant monologue about themselves and how the dress how they feel what the do yawn yawn yawn. Then there is the Tranny Shocker who gets a kick out of mildly vulgar displays of themselves to other Trannies and the general public who are in turn mildly revolted because, if a woman did that in public she would be regarded as somewhat of a slut! Both of these types offend others in one way or another and create barriers to the group for outsiders. Because the group tolerates them they think they are fine, but this is not the case.
This whole episode got me looking back at recent events that I had attended whilst dressed. I suddenly realised that on so many occasions people who were either not dressed or Genuine Girls (GG’s) were initially welcomed to the group for a few minutes only to be excluded within half an hour. A GG who is a regular attendee at our group politely told me the other day that it was probably time to go because the conversation had become dominated by makeup and shoes to the exclusion of any interest in her. It is ironic given that two of the ‘girls’ fancied her but made no real effort to bring her into the fold by actually asking questions about her instead they wanted to tell her about themselves. They expect her to chat them up! Bizarre!
I appreciate that when dressed we are so introspective because we get so little time to be ‘ourselves’ but when TV’s say I can’t find a girlfriend I now say no wonder why. You make no effort to talk to them as you are so self-interested. Because you have nobody else to talk to this all comes out when you should be spending time chatting her up!
The best place to meet a real girlfriend is when you are dressed not through some dating site (unless you state up front you are a TV). The Rubicon and barrier of your  femme of activities will have been exposed immediately and you can move onto the relationship part quicker than if you have to say Hi I am a boy who likes to dress as a girl after a couple of weeks of going out!
If you want a girl who quite likes Trannies why the bloody hell do you suddenly stop chatting them up and instead describe your femme side in intimate detail that is so so dull to listen to. If that is in truth what you really want.
One of our group has realised this. She started to try to date GG’s but soon realised that her Femme alter ego was taking up so much time that having a girlfriend who actually liked the Femme side would be too much effort and might even put a block on her fun. She felt that it would be too much to keep the girlfriend happy with both of her personalities vying for supremacy. She feels she has a rite of passage to go through before she enters the dating market again. At the moment her head is too full of Trannying to think straight about the relationship element and it would take up too much of her girly time. Good for her finally some objectivity, which of course is sadly lacking in the vast majority of the Tranny community!

Party TV 3

You Never Know Who Might Float Your Boat

 I have started to recognise patterns emerging where people (non Tranny) tend to float in and out of the group seeing a ‘chance’ but never really connect. People would join us but when the conversations came to me, me, me, they would switch off and move on to other places. Many Trannies I meet want to have a real girlfriend but when it comes to the hard graft of chatting them up all they bloody well want to do is talk about themselves.    (I have intentionally repeated this to try to drive the message home girls). Woe betide the GG who asks the question how are you and 45 minutes later says oh that’s really interesting before making her excuses to leave or taking strychnine to excuse herself from the conversation. Yep girls to the outsider although initially you can appear interesting and alluring  the reality is that you can be very very boring.
So be careful its fine doing things ‘en groupe’ and get caught up with that mentality but you will by default exclude the outsiders. For your group to be more inclusive you have to change the subject away from hair makeup, heels and hose. Particularly with real girls you have the opportunity to ask them what they think. You suddenly will have a partner you can go shopping with for both (remember both) of you. She has a new girlfriend with whom she can share things but only if you learn to speak girl and not Tranny.
And now I will rejoin my group who will regard me with suspicion from now on XXX
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